The Last Gift

I knew before December 2012, that Christmas would be different. My mom had passed away three months before, so I knew it might be tough. I wouldn't be going to JB’s by Temple Square to get her a gift certificate, one less person on my gift list. But I knew things would be okay, because I had made thru many Christmases without my dad.

When we went home for Thanksgiving, Mike had given us a package that had come from National Geographic. Mom would usually give us calendars for Christmas and apparently before she got sick, she ordered our Christmas gifts. There was one for each of her 7 children and a date book that she got for herself.  (I kept the date book for myself, since I forgot to buy one for myself.) There was also a statement for the calendars. So as a final Christmas gift, I sent a check to the National Geographic. Since I was the personal representative for Mom’s estate, I could have used that money, but it didn't seem right.

Mike kept his calendar, so I didn't need to send him one. I went to the bookstore, bought some large padded envelopes and mailed calendars to my siblings who lived in California and Washington. John got his calendar soon after the New Year, because Jay and I left his behind when we visited him on Christmas day. It meant something to me to carry out Mom’s final wish; that we all got a gift from her on Christmas day. I was grateful that she was shopping for Christmas in July.

A week or so before Christmas, Laura got a request from Mike. He wanted a calendar for Christmas, something like what Mom would give him. I think she had already sent Mike something, so she sent an email out and asked if one of us would grant Mike's wish. So one day, I went to the bookstore on campus, bought him a calendar. It wasn't a National Geographic, but a Sierra Club wall calendar. Then I bought a large padded envelope like I did the year before and mailed it off.

I miss those calendars just like Mike. But I am grateful that Mom thought of us each Christmas. The calendars weren't much, but I believe that my mom gave all that she could to us for Christmas. Mom was a widow for 32 years and basically made ends meet on my dad’s social security payments. I will always remember her final Christmas gift to us. Even though, she was suffering that summer, she still thought of us. Thank you, Mom for loving me, Dad, my siblings and all of your grandchildren.

Forgiveness - My Thoughts

“He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.”― Martin Luther King Jr. 

Over the past year, I have thought a lot about forgiveness. I even attended a workshop (or class) at LDS Single Adult Conference in May about forgiveness. It is one of the hardest commandments to live. Forgiving others is a constant battle for me. A few years back, I found myself saying “Susan, you don’t have to like that person, just don’t wish that person ill.” I found the anger inside leaving and kinder thoughts about that person being more frequent.  

I have seen examples in my life and I have read and heard stories of how the lack of forgiveness can affect lives and the lives of others. Recently over the pulpit, I have heard the story “A Piece of String”. A man was accused of robbery when he bent down to pick up a piece of string. Eventually he was released from prison when his innocence was discovered. But he never forgave those who put him in prison and would remind people quite a bit of why he was falsely imprisoned. On his death bed, this bitter man was still repeating the story of picking up a piece of string.  

Earlier in the year, I  read “Let It Go: A True Story of Tragedy and Forgiveness” by Chris Williams. It is a true account of what happen when he lost his wife and two children to a drunk driver. His first thoughts right after the accident was to forgive. At the time of the accident, Chris Williams did not know that the drunk driver lived in the same LDS ward as his wife’s parents. At the time this happened, I was a member of this same ward. Instead of the event dividing the ward, it united the ward. I am grateful that Chris Williams forgave. His decision to forgive affected more than his family. 

I thought of a friend, who passed away a year ago. When we worked together at the insurance company, we clashed. One December day, after both left the insurance company, I saw her at the temple. It was like whatever bad between us had happen was dissolved. What happened at the insurance company stayed there and was never mentioned. No apologies mentioned, but then the apologies weren't needed. We both let go of the anger and whatever bad was between us. She gave me a second chance and forgave me for being human. The atonement was able to work in our lives.

My Thoughts

A couple in my ward returned from their mission in Africa. Sister Curtis mentioned the good Nelson Mandela has done for South Africa and rest of Africa. Although apartheid is still alive; Nelson Mandela has done much for uniting Africa.  In Saturday's Salt Lake Tribune, The Associated Press quoted Learoto Moloi, which echoed what Sister Curtis said in church,  "For many years now, South Africans have got along with one another largely peacefully without Mr. Mandela having been active in the political sphere. In fact, Mr. Mandela's passing may be cause for many to reflect on the remarkably peaceful and swift racial integration of many parts of society, including schools, suburbs, universities, and workplaces." Moloi also said "Mr. Mandela will be viewed by many as having played a pivotal role in creating such a society." I like the words Bishop Desmond that were quoted earlier in the same article "The sun will rise tomorrow and the next day and the next. It may not appear as bright as yesterday, but life will carry on."
I was a full-time student at the University of Utah when Nelson Mandela was imprisoned. Some of the students protested South Africa's apartheid by constructing shanties on a piece of lawn between the Union and Orson Spencer Hall that faced the Marriott Library. The intent of the shanties was to leave them there until apartheid ended or Mr. Mandela was released, but the shanties were long gone before Mr. Mandela was released. The students may have also been protesting the support that American companies were investing in the South African government. Even though the mission of the student protest may not have been realized, it is a reminder of the global influence that Nelson Mandela had. I hope that Mr. Mandela's work will continue, not just in Africa, but here on American continents and the world. Racial, ethnic and gender inequality anywhere is unethical. "Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God;" Doctrine and Covenants 18:10

November on Facebook

Someone on Facebook must have posted a 30 day challenge in which people would express their gratitude daily. I saw a few doing this and I thought why not. So I posted each day, starting on a Sunday and ended 28 days later on the 30th. This was my list.

November 2, 2013

Quote by Marcus Tullius Cicero

"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others."

Quote by Gordon B. Hinckley

"Gratitude is a sign of maturity...Where there is appreciation: there is also courtesy and concern for the rights and property of others."

November 3, 2013 Today, I looked out the window and saw that the sun had come to visit. This was a pleasant surprise because it was snowing earlier that morning. Don't worry, the snow didn't stick to the ground, so driving was okay. That is my gratitude quote for today.

November 4, 2013 As I was getting ready this morning at work, I thought briefly of things I didn’t have growing up or what I don’t have now. But instead of being depressed, I realized how blessed I was. My parents struggled to make ends meet, but never did or my siblings felt deprived or less than others because Santa didn’t bring us much for Christmas. I live in a economically diverse ward (LDS neighborhood congregation) that also has different kinds of families. But I don’t feel like an outsider because I make less than I did 10 years ago or because I don’t have children. My parents taught by example – They didn’t act like have-nots and that helped me realized I am blessed. I have a roof over my head, I have a job. I have friends; I have family. I am blessed and for that I am grateful

November 5, 2013 one of the things I like best about the time change; enjoying the sun set while I am still on campus

It's the 1st Tuesday of November, so I am grateful to be able to vote. (It was a city election)

November 6, 2013 Today is a friend's birthday, who has moved on. I miss her, but hey, she is in a better place now; not suffering, but watching over loved ones. I am grateful for getting to know her better after we both left the insurance company we worked for. I am grateful for that second chance. She really was a good and kind person.

November 7, 2013 so grateful for those who have forgiven me for being a human. It is such a healing process for me to know there are second chances.

November 8, 2013 Tonight I am grateful for weekends. We all need a break from work.

November 9, 2013 Grateful for the kindness of others.

November 10, 2013 I am grateful for the diversity in my extended family. I have been taught tolerance, understanding and acceptance.

Quote by John F. Kennedy

"We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives."

November 11, 2013 Thanks to all the vets! That includes Joe.
I forgot to thank one vet and that is my dad. He served in Alaska during World War II. Years ago, his sister, Isabelle sent his letters to me. I didn't learn much of what went on in Alaska, but it was nice to read his letters. As a result of serving in cold Alaska, my dad lost his hearing. He taught me compassion. Thank you, Hyrum Lafayette Jackson for serving our country and for the sacrifices you made.

November 12, 2013 Tonight I went to the church to help tie some fleece blankets for the Granite Foundation with some other women in my ward. One of the blankets I tied was a purple print fleece. It reminded me of my nieces. Someone in their ward or stake did a Sub for Santa one year for them. And then I remember someone leaving a box of food at our door. All we knew that it was anonymous neighbor because by the time we answer the door, the person was gone. I am glad for those serve their fellow man because as it says in the scriptures when you serve others, you serve God.

November 13, 2013 Grateful for little Sister Pugh. She isn't afraid to say what needs to be said or do what is needed.

November 14, 2013 I'm thankful for the example my parents set for me. Live simply, give and be content with what I have.

Today I was able to notice the clouds and sun setting as I walked to the bus. The haze has blocked the view that last 2 days. So grateful for clear colorful skies.

November 15, 2013 I am thankful for sunsets and sunrise. I am reminded to see the beauty in life and to take the time to pause.

I'm grateful for music. It has comforted me; has been an inspiration. It has offered me smiles and opportunities to ponder.

November 16, 2013 "Because I've Been Given Much" is one of my favorite hymns. I am reminded of how blessed I am and as the hymn says "I too must give". In July 1993, Jay and I were evacuated from our apartment complex because heavy rains leaking through some roofs that were under construction. My friend, Jewel Pugh let us stay with her family until we found another place to live, despite that her kitchen was being remodeled. Because of that act of kindness, I found the need to pay it forward. Her children, including Crystal who was a year away from making her earthly debut at the time of my homelessness, got quite a few Happy Meals from McDonalds and dinners at Cafe Rio and Panda Express. But I also found myself donating to food drive, giving to Red Cross and Road Home. When I started working at the University of Utah, I noticed that the Campus Store (aka Book Store) did a Utah Food Bank drive. So every time, I visit Ralph (or one of his co-workers) during November I fill out a red & white donation post card. I usually write someone's else name. Like a co-worker who is on maternity leave and even got a former U.S. president yesterday. (Someone else used "George Clooney"). It is something I have to do because others have taken care of me when I needed it.

November 17, 2013 I can't really think of one single thing that I can put in words that I am grateful for today. So I will just post that I am thankful for what I have, which is a lot when it gets right down to it.

November 18, 2013 When I got off the bus one morning last week, a woman asked where the other person was. I said I hadn't seen her all week. She then mentioned that other person seemed so sad all the time. She did mention that life elsewhere can be worse than what her life is. I said that is so true. As we went our separate ways, I realized I was grateful for gratitude and that I was able to portray a positive attitude. My mother showed me by her quiet example to focus on what I had and not what I didn't have. I don't know why the other person seldom smiles; I felt sad that her countenance gives people the wrong impression. Like her, I don't how my countenance affects others, but I am glad that others notice a cheerful outlook even when I'm not fully awake. I think that having a grateful attitude makes a difference. And this morning as I got my breakfast at the Union. When I saw the other person, she smiled back. Maybe she is just as asleep as me or maybe she just needs a smile every now and then.

I like the gratitude posts I see on Facebook. It is inspiring and uplifting. Thanks to whoever started it.

Quote by Deitrich Bonhoeffer

"In ordinary life we hardly realize that we receive a great deal more than we give, and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich."

Quote by Kahill Gibran

"You pray in your distress and in your need; would that you might pray also in the fullness of your joy and in your days of abundance."

Woke up, couldn't find my other shoe until the last moment. Made it to the bus stop in time. Got on the bus and it tried to die. But after 10 minutes, the driver revived it. While I sat on the bus with others, I asked myself if it would be a bad day. Then I remember the cliche "Never judge a day by the morning." The alarm kept going off on the bus, indicating the bus still had issues as it continued on the route. Thanks to the freeway portion on the route, I got to campus at 7:30. I still had time to get breakfast at the Union. Despite the rough start, my day was okay. So glad I had that cliche to set me straight. "Never judge a day by the morning." — feeling good.

I like the gratitude posts I see on Facebook. It is inspiring and uplifting. Thanks to whoever started it.

November 19, 2013 I'm so lucky. I have a tendency to spoil my nieces and nephews and it has gotten worse as I aged. But despite it all, Tracina has never shown an attitude because I gave more to her daughters or brothers than her. I think she realizes that my income increased after I finished college. Thanks, Tracina for being understanding and not judging me.

November 20, 2013 I'm thankful for Popcorn Wednesday!

November 21, 2013 Thankful for a warm home tonight.

I am thankful I got home safely tonight. The route I took home tonight goes past the mouth of Parleys Canyon where the wind likes to get a bit nasty at times. It was blowing pretty hard while I was waiting for the bus, so I am glad the wind didn't run the bus off the road in that area.

November 22, 2013 I'm grateful for gentlemen and tender mercies. I got on Trax and the seats disappeared quickly. Because I have poor sense of balance, I need to sit or stand against a wall when in a moving vehicle or elevator. As I got to a spot to stand, a middle aged man tapped me and offered me his seat. Then when we got to Courthouse stop, another man offered his seat to an older woman who had just got on. Yes, women, there are still gentlemen in the world.

November 23, 2013 Grateful for a warm bed.

And I forgot the blankets that my sisters gave me and the quilt my mom made me.

November 24, 2013 I'm grateful for the little miracles that happen daily and God hears the desires of my heart.

Usually on a Sunday morning, I pack lotion in my scripture bag when I go to church. But because it was Stake Conference, I took my iPad. It has another set of scriptures, a hymn book and a note app. My iPad bag had just enough room for my cellphone, keys and a small package of tissues. Before the meeting started, I had to visit the ladies' room. As I washed hands, I noticed they seem dry. I realized that by washing again, my hands would be more dry. I thought I would have to wear my gloves to combat the comfortableness. But I never got my gloves out of my coat pocket. As the meeting was ending two hours later, I realized my hands did not feel dry. It was a small miracle and I realized again that God does hear the desires of our hearts.

November 25, 2013 Grateful for my family who has a sense of humor. Blame it my parents and those who are related to them. Laughter is a good thing.

My cousins, David Jackson, Shiloh Jackson and Gayle Jackson were the inspiration for this. Thanks, guys, you saved my Monday.

November 26, 2013

Quote by Eckhart Tolle

"Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance."

Grateful for the times that my brother can be sane, understanding and whatever else a normal person is like. I never know what to expect when he calls or when I visit, but glad when he can be kind.

November 27, 2013 So glad for UTA. Thanks to them, I got to see the eye doc, pay a short visit to the vampire and even shopped at Walgreen's for toothbrushes and toothpaste. (Vampire was at lunch when I arrived to have some lab work done)

November 28, 2013 “There are none so impoverished as those who do not acknowledge the abundance of their lives.” Richard Paul Evans, A Winter Dream

What are you thankful for? Instead of the usual status question, this is the question that Facebook posed today. I am grateful that my brothers and I had a pleasant visit with my brother in Idaho. Dinner wasn't much, but it was last minute shopping. Having fish fillet from the frozen food section of Walmart is easy to fix. We were able to leave before the sun disappeared, so we got in a short visit with Mom. Before we got to the Idaho-Utah border, I got a picture of the sun setting. The Magic Valley has some of the best sunsets. And I am glad we got back before bedtime. Life is good.

And I am thankful that McDonald's was opened for breakfast on Thanksgiving. It was such a nice little surprise. So glad for little surprises.

Quote by Irving Berlin

"Got no checkbooks, got no banks. Still I'd like to express my thanks - I've got the sun in the mornin' and the moon at night."

November 29, 2013 I am thankful for days off with pay. There are times when I need a guilt-free rest from the stress of being employed.

Quote by Henry B. Eyring

"You could ask yourself, 'How did God Bless me today?' If you do that long enough and with faith, you will find yourself remembering blessings. And sometimes you will have gifts brought to your mind which you failed to notice during the day, but which you will then know were a touch of God’s hand in life.”

November 30, 2013 Grateful for spare change that is not in my purse anymore. McDonald's Ronald McDonald House Charities got all of it on Thursday, except for a dime. Now McDonald's Kleenex box size boxes have that dime and whatever I got since Thursday. Spare change does have it causes

Quote by Habeeb Akande

"Gratitude leads to a good attitude"

A Picture Can Create a Memory or Two

My brothers and I spent Thanksgiving day at home. When we left that afternoon, we stopped by Paul Cemetery to visit Mom.Since I had my iPad with me, I decided to take some pictures. Before I got to the grave, I shot this picture of brothers paying their respects to our mom.This afternoon, I was thinking of this picture and remembered something I saw during my childhood. Not sure if I was in junior high or not.
I was looking out the window one day when I saw what I thought was a funeral taking place in the corral. All the sheep and another cow in standing in line in one row. In front of them was a dead cow with his feet facing those who were paying their respects. Maybe those animals had seen my siblings and me perform funerals for our cats and dogs who passed on. And then, I wondered now if I really saw what I did. It has been a few decades since this happen and I never bothered to write it down, but I think I remembered telling one of my siblings. But whether it really happened; I do get a smile when I think about it. Farm animals have funerals?

50 Years

50 years ago, John F. Kennedy was shot in Dallas, Texas. Unlike most people alive that day, I can’t recall where I was or what I was doing. I was only 5 years old at the time. My family must have talked about it, because I knew it had happened. All remember is that my brother, Steven and I were playing once. I was President Kennedy and he was Lee Harvey Oswald. I didn't want to die, so I hid under a bed sheet and Steven pointed a finger or toy gun at me. I remember Steven telling me that sheet was no protection against a gun.

Although, it’s been 50 years, I still find that John F. Kennedy has an impact on me. Maybe it is because I share a birthday with him. But then I share a birthday with Bob Hope and that impact isn't there. Most of my family (extended and immediate) is hard core Republican. So why do I check out most of the stories about Jack Kennedy and sometimes his family? I think that maybe as a child I was touched by the tragedy. And maybe his sudden death had an impact on me.

Kodak Moment with The Pie

On Friday of this week, the office called in an order to The Pie Pizzeria, more commonly known as The Pie.  When our delivery arrived, someone commented how big the box was. We ordered the giant size combo pizza. The comment reminded of my last year at Blue Cross.

The division I worked in at that time was training our replacements who were from Portland, Oregon. While they were in Salt Lake, they would ask for recommendations of good restaurants. I told them about The Pie, which had a new location in Midvale, which was not far from workplace. I had enjoyed pizza from The Pie when I was a student at the University of Utah. One day to show their appreciation, they ordered pizza from The Pie to be delivered to the office. When we walked into the conference room, our eyes popped wide open. Those giant size pizzas were huge! One of women from Portland commented that she wished she had a camera because it was a Kodak moment.

And so when I saw the giant box from The Pie, I had to take a picture. It was a Kodak moment I didn’t want to pass up.

The Joys of Sisterhood (or the joke’s on me)

My oldest sister, Mary took German while she was in high school, which was one of the three foreign languages taught at Minico.  Once after she told me to say “Ich bin krank”, I asked her what it meant. She said it meant that my sister was sick. So being the smarty pants I thought I was; I taunted my younger with the phrase “Ich bin krank.”  Laura, being the youngest of us all, took a lot a grief from us. When I got to high school, I decided to follow Mary’s example and take German. Ja! (Spanish, not German.) Within the first month, I discovered that I had been telling Laura that estuve enfermo. Mary!

Translations from Google

Ich bin krank = I am sick (German to English)

Ja! = Yes! (German to English)

Ja! = Ha! (Spanish to English)

Estuve enfermo = I was sick (Spanish to English)

What I learned on Criminal Minds This Past Week

Most Wednesday nights will find me in front of the TV, watching Criminal Minds. Since it was Halloween, it involved a crazed witch hunter. But Criminal Minds also focused on a lesser known holiday – Day of the Dead. Penelope Garcia, a computer geek, who usually stays back in Washington while the BAU (Behavorial Analysis Unit)team goes out into the field, has the team over for a Day of Dead celebration. All the team members have lost a loved one and one by one, the team puts a picture of a loved one on an altar that Garcia had.

On Friday, I was passing through the the University of Utah Union building and I noticed a display of dressed up skeletons on a table; probably Catrinas. That tweaked my interest even more. I had heard of Day of the Dead before, but until Criminal Minds portrayed the event, I paid little attention to it. So I looked up Day of the Dead on Wikipedia, a online encyclopedia. I learned that the holiday has roots in Mexico and it also celebrated in other cultures.

When Jay called from Idaho this weekend, I asked him if he had stopped to the cemetery. Since he hadn’t, I told him a bit about Day of the Dead. The Magic Valley in Idaho has a noticeable Mexican culture, so I figured that cemeteries in the valley would be visited this weekend. When he got to the cemetery, he called and told me that there were some decorations up. He did mention pumpkins on some of the graves. I don’t think all the decorations were for the Day of the Dead.

Although the holiday is over, I thought of who I would have honored on this Day of the Dead. My thoughts turned to my family, just like Garcia did in Criminal Minds. I thought of my parents, but I settled on my cousin, Edward Jackson. He died while I was still in junior high (middle school). I had lost other relatives, but he was first relative that I knew who died. When his family lived in Idaho, our families would visit each other often. Often we would pair up with the cousin who was closest to our age. Lou Jane and I would play with each other and Mary and Emmalee would do the same. Although Edward was the oldest, he would hang out with John, who was Emmalee’s age; while Mike, the oldest child in our family would hang out with Bryant, who was just younger than Mary. Edward and Mike attended Ricks College (now BYU-Idaho) at the same time. One weekend Edward came home with Mike and they hung together. Without his family, I noticed a different side of Edward. He just seemed a bit quieter. He spoke to me like I was a teen-ager instead of a child.  That weekend was the last time I saw Edward. A year later, he was killed in accident in Southern Colorado. I still miss Edward forty plus years later. If I were to visit his grave this year in Manassa, Colorado, I would leave a Dove dark chocolate bar and say thanks for being kind to me that weekend. And then, I would go say Hi to my dad. It’s been awhile since I visited him.

Lighting Up The Night

Last weekend, I flew to Seattle to walk “Light The Night” with my sisters and my nieces. I had done a similar walk years ago in Sugarhouse Park with my work. At that time, I walked for two brothers who had Leukemia. I carried a red balloon in their memory. A few years after I walked in Sugarhouse Park, my Aunt Maevonne got Lymphoma. I looked up other walks in Colorado, but I never walked any in any of the event. I didn’t even bother to register.

When Mom was diagnosed with Lymphoma last year, I looked up the site again. But with stress of losing her, I forgot until after she died. I was at a local fast food restaurant when I saw a flyer for “Light The Night” in Sugarhouse Park. I thought of doing, but then I realized it was too emotional for me to do. So I concentrated on dealing with her estate and set a goal of walking in 2013.

As autumn approached, I realized my goal of doing the walk. But I wasn'tSalt Lake since it isn't an event one does alone. So I checked out other states, even Colorado, before deciding on the Seattle area. I knew I could count on my sisters to support me. So I registered and made reservations with Southwest, who has weekend getaway fares. My sister, Laura formed TeamBoice and soon my sister, Mary signed up. Then Tracina and her family joined in the fund raising efforts.sure if I wanted to do the walk in.

The day of the event was rainy, but then what can you expect of Seattle. Bill, Laura’s husband, drove us there. He checked out the free food while we picked up our t-shirts and lighted balloons. Bill highly recommended the clam chowder, which was very good. Mary got sick, so I picked up her t-shirt and balloon. I thought one of her granddaughters could carry the balloon. Eventually, Tracina and her daughters got to the park. I gave the Bella and MoMo each a balloon, one for each of their grandmas. (Their dad’s mom also has Lymphoma.) It was then that Tracina told us the walk had been canceled. It wasn't the rain, but the wind. We looked over and a large group of walkers were heading out on the trail. Even though the event was canceled, no one discouraged anyone from walking around Green Lake. We walked a short distance and saw some down trees, but none in the path that went around the lake. After we got back, we saw a large group come back. We could see the glow of the lights from the blinking necklaces and some of the lightened balloons. It made me realize that hope can be the light in the midst of darkness. Someday, there will be a cure for cancer.

Before Tracina and her daughters boarded the bus (back to their car), I gave her my balloons (They gave away balloons free after the walk was canceled.) to give her daughter, Vanessa. She had to work and she is quite close to her grandmas. Laura, Bill and I left to see Isaac and his family before we headed home.

Although the walk was canceled, I was glad I flew to Seattle to walk with my sisters. Mom liked it when I walked for the two brothers, one who was her bishop for a short time. She would have liked that we walked for her and her sister, Maevonne. And she would have loved that the Bella and MoMo walked for their paternal grandma too.

Division

About five years ago, I was wandering thru the Campus Store (more commonly known as the Bookstore) at the University of Utah. It was probably late October or early November when I saw a navy blue, white and red flag. No, it wasn’t an American flag, but a rivalry flag. BYU and Utah were evenly represented. I bought it and a matching tumbler. I kept the flag, but I gave the tumbler to my friends, who are also a divided family. Grandma Pugh, who had Alzheimer’s, didn’t like the BYU side of the tumbler like her grandson, Jason did, a staunch BYU fan.

As it got closer to Thanksgiving, I hung up the flag in the unit we live in. Jay, a dyed in the wool BYU fan, didn’t want it on the front door, so I hung in the entry way. I can’t remember who won that year, but if it was 2009, it was BYU. That year, Jay bought me soup and that was more painful than comforting. In our household of two, the loser got the soup or some other comfort food.

After the game, the flag came down and was packed away in the closet until the next year. I am not sure if it came out in 2011, the first year the rivalry moved to September, thanks to BYU going independent and Utah moving to the PAC12. It didn’t come out in 2012 because of our Mom’s illness. I didn’t get into the rivalry like I usually did. My cousin, Coach Jackson did give me some grief on Facebook like he usually does. I was glad for that distraction, even though I wasn’t into it that much. The day before the game, I flew out to Seattle, to be with my Mom once more. But Mom died before I boarded the plane. I had packed my “Utah” clothing, so I was wearing red on game day. Laura had to use Kohl’s coupon, so during the game I was shopping. But my friend in Ogden kept me posted on the score.

Two weeks before the game this year, Coach tagged me in one of his post. Apparently he posted a BYU football photo in my honor. I was back. It wasn’t until I posted a photo I took years ago, that I realized I was enjoying the rivalry again. It felt good. I managed to tag family members on my photo. All were tagged on the top half, except for Steven, my almost twin brother. He attended BYU and Utah, so I did my best to get him in that middle part where it was white. But his name showed up on Utah side with me.

When Coach said something about BYU being on top, I knew I had to get out the camera again. After a few shots, I finally got one that I could post. BYU and Utah were pretty much even in the landscape shot. It was easier getting Steven’s name right smack in the white middle. Of course, Coach noticed and asked why. I gave him some lame excuse, because I wasn’t ready to confess. I added a few more BYU relatives on both of parent’s side of the family. I even posted Jason near the “Y” and two of his sibling in the white middle. Jason’s sister has flip-flopped quite a bit and Jared has been a fan of both teams. And besides, I knew I needed to be the lone Utah fan in the red part of the flag. It was sometime this summer that I realized I am the only one in my family – paternal and maternal – that is not a confirmed BYU fan. I’ve been bleeding red since my return to the Salt Lake Valley many years ago. Even when I didn’t particularly care for the University of Utah, I didn’t cheer for BYU

Even though, the Utah-BYU rivalry is on hiatus for two years, the house is still divided. After all, the two teams will suit up for basketball and other sports. The division will be less intense.

To be continued . . . in 2016.

Being With Mom

Ten years ago today, I was with Mom and her sister in Illinois. We started the day by going to church and then it was on to Carthage. After our tour of the Carthage Jail, we headed headed south and a bit east, then west. It was like an extended ride in the country which was a favorite past time of Mom's. After our trip in the country, we returned to Nauvoo, where we had been staying the few days.

Five years ago during the first week in August, my older sister, Mary visited Idaho. Since she was so close to Utah, Mary decided to pay a visit to Idaho. Mary's best friend from childhood and Mom traveled with her. While in Utah, we decided to ride the Heber Valley Railroad; an old steam engine that ran between Heber City and Bridal Veil Falls in Provo Canyon. Mom mentioned that she rode similar trains as a young career woman from California to Colorado and back quite a few times and probably in Colorado a few times.  Mom rode the in the open air car round trip. She must have remember how stiff the seats were or maybe she liked the breeze. But it was cool to ride on train that Mom rode on as a young person. 

A year ago I took my last plane ride with my Mom.  I arrived at airport to fly alone to Seattle. I was hoping to see Mom one last time before she left this earthly life. But an hour before my flight left, my sister, Laura called to say that Mom was gone. Needless to say, I felt quite alone until I was standing in line. I felt Mom's presence close to me. It was such a comfort to feel of her spirit thru out the flight.

Each September my thoughts will return to the passing of my mother, just like each February when I think of my father. I decided that I would take a ride "in the country" via Frontrunner on September 14th. But it didn't work out that way. Due to poor planning I realized a trip to Provo was out. Frontrunner only runs every hour. I didn't want to wait that long at any station. So I decided to the Trax red line to Daybreak. If memory served me right, there was a sugar factory in West Jordan similar to the one in Paul, Idaho. And then I heard reports that there wasn't anything to view on the red line after it left Fashion Place station. I figured West Jordan and South Jordan would be as rural as I would get in Salt Lake County.

So after I boarded the red line at Murray North station, I was for southwest  part of the county. I got off at Redwood Road station for a break. I realized I was like Mom, who had to take such a break ten years ago. When I got back on, it was announced that the next stop was "Sugar Factory Road".  I didn't get off, but I searched for any remnants of a sugar factory. I didn't see any, but it was nice to know that I remembered correctly. I didn't see much open space until after 4800 West. When the train got to the South Jordan Parkway, I decided to get off instead of continuing on to the end of the line,which was the next stop. I was glad I did. It was probably the most open of all the Trax stations along the red line. I took a picture of the Kennecott mine.

And then I looked east and saw the Oquirrh Temple. Mom would have been pleased to see that. She always loved to see a temple. She always made in a point to go to the Idaho Falls and Boise temples when the Paul 2nd Ward had temple trips. She even made regular trips to the Logan temple with a group of friends. And when the Twin Falls temple opened, her home teacher, Clint Harper took her often.  So I took my cellphone out again and took a few pictures of the temple in the distance. I looked for the Jordan River temple, which can be seen from the Oquirrh Temple, but it was too far away. 

After a few minutes, the train came, probably the same one I had been on when I got at that stop or the one at Redwood Road. Instead of a ride "in the country" I got a ride in "to the country" and I had my trip with Mom. She did ride Trax a few times, but this was probably the first she rode on one of the new cars. Even I though I didn't sense her presence on my little trip, I wouldn't be surprised she joined me on this adventure. 

Life Goes On

Last September, I flew to Seattle to see my Mom and my sisters. An hour before I boarded, my sister called to tell that Mom had passed. But I still went; because when I made the reservation I decided I would see my sisters regardless of what would happen. When I got to Seattle, my niece, Tracina picked me up and we headed straight to the care center in Enumclaw where my Mom spent her last week. (The mortuary waited until I got there to take her away.) When I got to the care center, my sisters, Laura and Mary were still there. So was my nephew, Skylar. He waited patiently as we began planning for the funeral and contacted the mortuary in Burley, Idaho. Most of the time, he waited in the car. After what was a long wait, Laura drove Skylar and me to the house. I don’t remember Skylar saying much, probably because Laura and I were both talking to the mortuary in Burley. Shortly after we got home, I looked at the window and Skylar was quietly jumping on the trampoline. So I took out my cell phone and took a picture. Even though, Skylar needed time to himself, he reminded me that life does goes on.

And life has gone on.

The Desert Blossoming As The Rose

When John and I were in Rupert, Idaho last September, we stopped by the Square. There was a display by the restored Wilson Theatre that mentioned that the area had blossomed like a rose, especially after homesteaders began farming the area in 1950's. A scripture in Isaiah was quoted, which mentioned a desert blooming like a rose. John had his scriptures on him and looked up similar scriptures. He later wrote the irrigation project in Minidoka County was a prophecy fulfilled. And I thought the scripture was about the fulfillment of prophecy in Salt Lake Valley. When the Mormon Pioneers settled the Salt Lake Valley, it was desert. Jim Bridger, a frontiersman, doubted a bushel of corn could grow in the area that Brigham Young desired to settle. I imagine Jim Bridger would be surprised that in 2002, the Salt Lake Valley hosted the Winter Olympics.

So while the Salt Lake Valley desert was blossoming as a rose, so was the desert in the Magic Valley. In the 1950’s, there was a big push to invite farmers to homestead in Minidoka County. One of the events that made this possible was pumping water from the ground.  Diverting water through the use of dams along the Snake River was another event that led to homesteaders coming to the Magic Valley. Although Minidoka County borders the Snake River, there are no creeks in the county. There are only man made canals running through Minidoka County. There are plenty of wells, which provide water for many farmers in the county. This makes me realize, I never thought I grew up in a desert.  I was surrounded by many farms that displayed the colors of green; potatoes, alfalfa, barley, sugar beets, etc.

And then I realize that scripture in Isaiah 35:1 " ... and the desert shall rejoice, and blossom as the rose." has been fulfilled in the Magic Valley.

Pioneers In Their Own Way

July 24th is a state holiday in Utah. Most business, except for banks and the federal agencies close shop for the day, so that residents can celebrate the Mormon Pioneers entering the Salt Lake Valley. Only the wagon company of Brigham Young entered the valley on July 24th. A few months, another group entered the valley and in the coming years, other companies followed. Some of the companies consisted of handcarts. Most of my ancestors came west with pioneers the traditional, but two of pioneering ancestors came a less traditional way.

Benjamin Jackson left England in 1849. He boarded a ship and wasn't heard until the late 1860's. By then, his wife had given up and decided he was dead, so she married another man. So when Benjamin Jackson found his way to Nephi, he told the story of what happened after he left England. Benjamin crossed the Atlantic Ocean successfully, but while crossing the plain, he joined a group of Forty-Niners and headed to California to search for gold. Maybe he thought it would be a quick way to bring him family to America. Benjamin never wrote his family, probably because he couldn't read and he would have to pay someone to write the letter. Benjamin in his later years moved to Salt Lake City to live with his daughter, Elizabeth. He is buried in the Salt Lake City Cemetery, along with John Taylor, a former president of the LDS Church and other famous Mormons.

Elihu Kisor Ball was living in Russell, Virginia when he joined the LDS Church. On April 15, 1878, Elihu left his native Virginia with a nephew,Balford after a sorrowful farewell for Utah. They traveled first by horseback for the first 30 miles and then walked to Pikeville, Kentucky. Elihu and Balford bought a small flatboat sailed down the Big Sandy River to Louisa, West Virginia to visit with relatives. It was here that Balford got home sick and returned to Virginia. It was the last Elihu saw his nephew. On May 1st, Elihu boarded a streamboat and sailed on the Big Sandy River to Cincinnati, Ohio where he boarded the train to Salt Lake City, Utah. He stayed in Salt Lake until 1880 when he was sent by Brigham Young to help settle the San Luis Valley in southern Colorado.

35 Years Ago

This morning as I ate breakfast, I read the Salt Lake Tribune. Peggy Fletcher Stack wrote an article about the 35^th year anniversary of the blacks receiving the priesthood. I remembered Mom coming home from town that day and telling me that George could have the priesthood. I gave her quizzing look because she had to remind me who George was.. I was thinking of another George who I knew in Salt Lake my first year of college. He was strange and I am pretty sure he might have passed the sacrament in the branch I sometimes attended. When Mom mentioned it was my FHE (family home evening) brother from Ricks College then I understood. George came to Ricks College my second semester there. He wasn’t a member, but he still returned for a second time. I found out the following fall that he had been in my brother, John’s and my roommate, Deb’s branch the previous year while I had been in Salt Lake. Toward the end of the semester, George joined the church; students from the 8^th and 29^th branch were in attendance. I think it was the biggest convert baptism that I ever attended. As I look back on George’s baptism, I realize it took him a lot of courage to join the church. He joined knowing he would not have the full benefits of membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. In April of 1978, he wasn’t able to have the priesthood, serve a mission or even marry in the temple. But on June 8, 1978 all that changed for George and other Mormons of African heritage. Now I know of a biracial young man serving in Brazil and his brother who has been called to serve in California later this year. Most weeks in Sacrament Meeting, I see a young man from Africa pass the sacrament to members in the church. All because President Spencer W. Kimball announced that the priesthood was to be extended all worthy males 12 and over, 35 years on warm June day.

Inspired by History

Like most women, I am inspired by the stories that Mom told me of my grandmas. Some of the histories are from relatives. I don’t know who told me of Ann Grimshaw Jackson, but I admire her for getting on a ship and crossing the plains in handcart to settle in Nephi, Utah. Her husband, Benjamin Jackson, left England to pave the way. After he left, she never heard from him for a few decades. So after a few years he left, she took her family and got a ship sailing for America, which stopped in Boston (or New York) to meet with a son, who had come ahead also. Whether the son came with his dad, I am not sure. The son did not want to travel west, so she caught the train heading west, knowing that she would never see her son again. The train stopped in Iowa, where she and other families traveling to Salt Lake prepared for their journey. They were in the Martin Handcart Company that left in July. Ann had a weak heart, so she wasn't able to pull a handcart. That job was left to Samuel, my great-grandpa and another son. I think two of her daughters also pulled a handcart. Ann would walk with her youngest son each day, starting out before the rest of the company and usually coming in after everyone had camped for the night. If you know of LDS church history, you know that since the Martin and Willie Handcart Companies left Iowa in July and were both caught in early winter storms in Wyoming during the month of October. Ann’s family made it to Salt Lake Valley. But her son, Joseph died soon after. Years after she settled in Nephi, her husband, Benjamin came to Utah. It was the first time in a very long time that Ann had heard anything of him. When he got to America, he joined up with some 49er’s.  The lure of gold held the promise of bringing his family to America. I admire the courage Ann Grimshaw Jackson had.

Martha Eliza Philpot Boice traveled in the Willie Handcart Company that was just ahead of the Martin Handcart. Her dad, William Philpot, died somewhere along the Sweetwater River in Wyoming. A few days later, Martha Eliza’s step mom died. Then it was just two teenage sister who made it to the Salt Lake Valley on their own. My Mom once told me that because of the hardships Martha Eliza’s suffered in the early winter storm of 1856, she had problems walking, but she continue on until she reach Salt Lake, where she met Benjamin Boice. I admire the perseverance that Martha Eliza had. 

There is one grandma whose stories I learned from LDS Church history. But of course my Mom let me know I was related to her. Amanda Barnes Smith is well known for happen at Haun’s Mill, Missouri in 1830’s. After her husband and a son had been killed by a mob at the blacksmith shop, she had the faith that another son’s hip would heal after most of it had been shot away. She had him lay still for days when she put an ash mixture into his hip. Recently in the Ensign, the official LDS magazine, I read about her taking her horse back after it had been stolen, probably from someone who had been part of the mob.  She needed the horse to leave Missouri as the Mormons were ordered to leave the state as soon as possible if not sooner. I admire the faith Amanda Barnes Smith had.

I never knew my paternal grandma. Jane Schofield Jackson died shortly after my oldest brother was born. But I have learned of her through various relatives. Jane was widowed when my dad was three years old. She raised a young family by herself and most likely got support from the community that thrived in Manassa, Colorado. I was told that Jane could have lost her family when her husband, Lafayette died of cancer. I admire the strength Jane had to carry on through out a difficult time.

I did get to know my maternal grandma. Mary Slade Boice often visited us in Idaho. Every Christmas she sent her grandchildren homemade popcorn balls. One year, she almost decided not to send the popcorn balls. But she decided that despite the high cost of sugar, her grandchildren deserved a Christmas gift. When her daughter, Betty was dating a young man of Japanese descent, Grandma welcomed Herb Oba with open arms. World War II was still fresh in the minds of many Americans. Grandma also accepted my brother-in-law, Doug Stewart, two oldest children as her own grandchildren. I admire the kindness Mary Slade Boice showed throughout her life.

And then there is my Mom, Mary LaRee Boice Jackson. Mom passed away recently of cancer and as I remember her, I think of all the qualities my Grandmas had. Mom inherited them also, even the traits from her in-laws. Dad’s family was important to her. Like her mother, she also accepted the in-laws as family. Mom drew on strength as she raised her family and took care of my oldest brother in her later years. Mom carried on with faith, preserved through her battle and had the courage to forge ahead throughout her life. Mom is an inspiration to me as I continue throughout life. Mom has taught me to put my trust in the Lord. And I must admit that she learned from my grandmas. We were inspired by our personal histories.